As I fixed a cup of coffee at 3:45am while trying to soothe my fussy baby I think "you have got to be kidding me! We both so badly need some relief." But then as I sat on the couch rocking her with her head buried in my neck I caught a whiff of her formula breath. Mmmmm! I took another whiff of it and rubbed her face with mine. I thought about my phone conversations with my mom and grandmas. Me "Hey! What are you up to? "
Them "Oh not much. Had lunch. Went to the store. Came home. Watched (insert favorite show)." Life of ease.
I update them on my long, busy day/week and tell them how much I didn't get done.
Towards the end of the convo, they always say "I sure do miss you. I would love to see you!"
I decide, at least for tonight, I am going ignore how tired I am and soak up every single second of my baby wanting and needing me. Tomorrow will come. I will be well rested. I will go bed when I want and to the store (and bathroom) alone. When I have Kynnli on the phone I will listen to everything she has to say about her long, crazy, and busy days. Because at that point she won't need me to hold and rock her for hours, days. She will only need me to listen for a few mins, every few days. And I will miss rocking my little baby.
Them "Oh not much. Had lunch. Went to the store. Came home. Watched (insert favorite show)." Life of ease.
I update them on my long, busy day/week and tell them how much I didn't get done.
Towards the end of the convo, they always say "I sure do miss you. I would love to see you!"
I decide, at least for tonight, I am going ignore how tired I am and soak up every single second of my baby wanting and needing me. Tomorrow will come. I will be well rested. I will go bed when I want and to the store (and bathroom) alone. When I have Kynnli on the phone I will listen to everything she has to say about her long, crazy, and busy days. Because at that point she won't need me to hold and rock her for hours, days. She will only need me to listen for a few mins, every few days. And I will miss rocking my little baby.
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